Dinner With a Perfect Gentleman

I ate dinner with a gentleman tonight.

I watched as he pulled out his lovely wife’s chair, took her jacket, and made sure she was comfortable. I watched him genuinely care about how everyone around him was doing. I watched him notice that I was freezing cold, and immediately offer me his suit coat. I confided in him that I had no idea what order to use the six pieces of silverware laid out for our three course meal. And as he quietly, kindly gave me an etiquette lesson, I was left wondering, “How does he know that? I didn’t know guys cared about these things!” When I was asked to pass the creamer, with its delicate pitcher and accompanying saucer, I remarked how I was nervous that I would break something at this much-too-fancy dinner table. He just smiled and said, “You’re doing a good job.” I watched him laugh, and make everyone relax despite our formal surroundings, and I realized that he had put me, too, completely at ease in an environment where it was not easy to do so. I was extremely disappointed, but impressed, when he excused himself early from dinner to go pick up his two young sons from their grandparent’s house, so his wife could enjoy the rest of the party knowing her kiddos were in bed.

Yes, I ate dinner with a gentleman. A perfect gentleman. I leaned over to his wife after dinner and said, “You’re husband is the best, but I think you took the last gentleman on earth. Because few of the guys I know treat people the way he does.” And she smiled, as if she knew some great secret that I did not, and replied, “Rachel, there’s a boy out there who is just waiting to treat you like that. I might take a while to find him, but he’s there.”

I must say that she has more confidence than I do, but she did make me think.

 Why do I sometimes search so hard for love and acceptance that I will settle for a guy who walks all over me, treats me like dirt, and in no way views me as something to be treasured? Why do I set myself up for heartache?  And I realized something there, at that dinner table: I settle far too easily because I get impatient, discouraged, or worried that if I don’t take whatever guy happens to show interest in me, I might never get one at all. 

It took eating dinner with a perfect gentleman to realize that I want a man like that. It took seeing the way he looked at his wife, the look where you can tell that he is just madly in love with her, to realize that I want someone who looks at me like that.  It took watching him live out character, humility, and kindness to realize that true men really do exist. Thank God that He opens our eyes to the mistakes we are making. Thank God that He gives us a second chance, and helps us do it right this time around. Thank God for new hope.



Thank God for perfect gentleman.